Me or Her
by thebluestbird
Summary: It's either me or her.
1. Chapter 1

**Me or Her**

**BY: OZZIE13**

**I don't own anything Twilight related.**

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_Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean. - Maya Angelou_

"I did it because I wanted to!" She yelled frantically.

"What you did was stupid, you hear me Leah? STUPID!" He screamed. He saw her body vibrate, she was trying hard not to phase, and he knew he was pushing her too far. He just couldn't get why she would do something so reckless, so ridiculous.

Leah didn't reply as she kept walking towards the earthy green forest. The sky was gray and silent but if she focused hard she could hear the whiney bitch, Isabella.

He grabbed her arm and made sure she couldn't go anywhere. Reluctantly Leah turned her gaze to a furious Jacob Black.

"You will not walk away from me!" He boomed. Leah closed her eyes breathing in, trying desperately not to phase. She held her eyes shut, not daring to open them. She wasn't going to react. He just didn't understand what she did, and he never would.

Jacob's grip became tighter and Leah actually ___whimpered_. She knew she was going to receive a bruise. Jacob did not let go, instead, if at all possible, his grip became tighter. He was so angry that he didn't care that he was hurting Leah.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!" he yelled. She reluctantly opened her eyes but what she saw was not the Jacob Black she knew, he was different, he was one of them.

"You're hurting me." Leah whispered.

Jacob did not let go, it was as if he had tunnel vision. He couldn't think about anything else. ___Leah hurt Isabella_, which was the only thing going through his mind.

"Tell me why!" he demanded and Leah had no option, she had to tell him. His grip was seriously painful; her breathing became heavy. This was the first time she couldn't protect herself. Then again no one could go against an Alpha.

"I did this for you." She whispered into the wind, her voice was so soft he almost missed what she had said. In an instant he dropped his hold on her. Leah automatically rubbed her black and purple bruise.

"What are you talking about?" He spat, disbelief written all over his face.

_Leah Clearwater did not care about anyone. She didn't give a shit, ____right?_ Jacob thought.

"You heard me Black." She hissed, she knew he wouldn't understand why she cared so much.

"You're lying!" He accused, he just couldn't believe it. Leah was... not like this.

"Just because I'm a bitter bitch doesn't mean I don't care. I just couldn't take it anymore. I hated what she was doing to you. What they're all still doing to you." she said. Looking into his stunned brown eyes she knew it was now or never.

"Do you even see what she's doing? Do you even realize that you haven't seen your father for a month? That you haven't even gone to school? You don't even hang out with your best friends anymore; you're not the same Jacob Black. You've changed." She told him. She got a hold of his shoulders and started shaking them.

"Wake up Black."

He looked at her through a haze. Sure he hadn't gone home in awhile, and sure he missed classes, and maybe he hadn't spent time with Embry and Quil, it didn't mean he forgot them; he was just busy, that was all. It was the fact that Nessie was growing up so fast; he wanted to spend more time with her, to make sure she was okay. And Bella was still his best friend. He cared dearly for her. She would always have a piece of him and that was just the way it was. Not that he would want it any other way.

"You don't know what you're talking about." he stated.

"Just listen to me: she used you. When Edward left she came running to you, when Edward came back, she left you. She just had you around because she was suicidal, bored or some such shit. She doesn't love you Black. She loves him; she married him, ___NOT_ YOU." She pled, trying to get him to see the truth.

"Be quiet." He spat with venom. His anger rising to the surface again.

"It's not the same, I have Nessie now, I love her, I see Bella as my best friend; something you would know nothing of." he said furiously.

Leah glared at him. "If Nessie was never born, you would be off somewhere in Canada crying over your bitch of a friend. You just don't get it, she fucking ___used _you. She didn't care what pain she was causing you, you meant little to her. She doesn't ___care_ Jake, she never did."

Leah barely got to finish before she felt her body hitting a tree. The huge tree broke in half and Leah felt Jacob yank her short black hair and got her up. His warm rough hand held her by the neck and she was a few feet off the ground.

"TAKE IT BACK!" He yelled. His brain wasn't working, he wasn't thinking, he was just feeling and he felt all consuming rage.

"No." Leah whispered with the remaining air she had left. His hold was tight, and she knew she was probably cherry red. Jacob's hand had never touched her like this. He wasn't who she thought he was. This was a different person. This was not the boy who uses to pick flowers for her anymore.

Jacob gripped her neck tighter. Leah began to turn blue, not even trying to break his firm hold. He just watched her.

Out of nowhere Leah was on the floor, panting, trying to suck in as much of air as possible, reliving her burning lungs. Her head felt light and dizzy. She could hear people, but most importantly she could smell them. _The Cullen's_. She heard Jacob growling.

When her breathing had become somewhat normal, she got to her feet, and watched the scene before her. Jacob was being held back by Edward and Jasper.

Jasper was trying to calm him, but it wasn't working, instead she thought he was making it worse.

Jacob's once brown warm eyes, stared at her with hate. Just looking at him hurt.

Rosalie was also there, and she was making her way to Leah. She stopped a few feet away, not wanting to overwhelm Leah.

"Are you okay?" Rosalie asked.

Rosalie was never the one who would give a shit, it surprised Leah that she was the one trying to make sure she was okay, but Leah was so angry she snapped at her.

"I'm fine."

Finally, taking one last look at Jacob Black, Leah turned around and felt the heat making its was way down her spine, she exploded and made her way to the one and only place she knew she would be welcomed.

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

_I hate and I love. And if you ask me how, I do not know I only feel it, and I'm torn in two._

_- Catullus_

She knocked twice on the dark brown wooden door, waiting impatiently for him to answer. She was damaged, not only physically, but mentally. She knew she would heal physically but there was nothing out there that could heal her destroyed heart.

It took him a while, but he finally opened the door. He was in black sweats but no shirt. His black short hair was everywhere. His rough warm hands rubbing his face trying to wake himself.

He stared at her with a sleepy haze, he wasn't shocked to see her, since they were together always, but he was concerned and furious when he saw her arm and neck. She was marked with blue and purple hand prints. Seeing that someone did this to her made him angry. A deafening deep growl came from his well built golden chest.

"Leah what happened?" He demanded. His big greyish-black eyes turning dark, it was clear that he was upset and planning on killing the bastard who did this to her. Leah took a deep breath and walked in. The cottage he was living in was warm and cosy. She made her way to the couch as usual and lay down with a soft sign.

Her head was throbbing a bit and she just wanted to sleep, but she knew he wouldn't drop the case. He turned her body a little, making room so he could sit in front of her waist. He glanced at her, waiting for her to start but instead she closed her heavy eye lids and took in deep breaths.

"You need to tell me what happened." He stated firmly, ever since this weird messed up friendship they had started, he felt protective over her, always making sure she was fine. He'd transformed everything he had felt towards her before, into something beautiful and peaceful: friendship. He had once thought she was a bitter bitch who needed to jump off a cliff, but now he couldn't imagine not seeing her every day.

The same thing applied to her too, she had thought he was a pig with a peanut sized brain, a jerk and he wouldn't forget to remind her ever opportunity he received. He was annoying and oh so blunt, he never thought things through and just said what he wanted too, not caring at all if people got offended.

She loved that about him though, how he was honest with her while others who pretended to care for her, lied to her. He was different now that she understood him. He was important to her, someone that made her life easier. She didn't think she could go a day without him; he was just so easy to be around.

She took another deep breath and opened her tired eyes.

"I don't need to tell you shit." She whispered a small smirk on her face. She was wrong though; she needed to tell someone, someone like him. He would understand her, and actually let her explain herself without being judged. The whole Jacob dilemma was eating her alive.

"You don't need to, but I know you want too." He said his thin pink lips forming a massive smile. He just knew her too well.

Leah rolled her drowsy eyes and whispered: "It's Jacob."

He didn't say anything; both looking apprehensive. She knew he had heard her but he didn't say anything. She was anticipating another lecture from him, telling her how she should forget about Black but they both just stared at one another and then finally he got to his feet and his shaking form made its way to the door.

"Where are you going?" Leah asked, she unwillingly came to her feet and ran after him. He was already in the middle of the clearing that was in front of his house.

"Where are you going?" Leah repeated herself, her voice full of annoyance. She didn't want to start anything, especially when she was exhausted.

"I'm going to kick that bastard's ass!" He boomed. He came to an utter stop in front of the forest when Leah grabbed his wrist and he irritably turned around to face her.

Leah's face was pained; she didn't want Jacob hurt even though he had hurt her in so many ways. She had this soft side for him, a place in her heart where he controlled her undying love for him, though she would never admit.

"You can't do that." She stated. Looking into his still dark eyes, it was quite and eerie, all they could hear was the animals in the forest. He pulled his wrist from her sharply and turned around; his body began to quiver.

"How could you let him get away with this?!" He insisted, fury building up. "He hurt you Leah! He always hurts you!" He yelled his fist clenched to his sides tightly. She could feel the truth of his words weigh in.

He was so right, that it hurt for Leah to admit it. Jacob Black was always hurting her in some way. He didn't realise it but she did. She was in so deep that she didn't care if Jacob hurt her, as long as he needed her around, as long as she got to be around him and talk to him and see him smile. It was enough for her, for now.

"Do you expect me to just sit around and watch you constantly get hurt?" he demanded.

Leah looked at him; she didn't know what to say. It was sweet that he cared, but there was nothing she could do about this situation. It was simple honesty, she couldn't be away from Black, and Black couldn't be away from his imprint and her family. She knew the only way to at least see him is if she stayed calm and at least behaved civilly towards Isabella and her little family.

"You're my friend, my sister and I'm not going to let some jerk fuck up your life!" He told her.

"My life was already fucked up." She stated. It was true.

"Stop it than! Change your fucking life around. Stop going back if you know you're going to get hurt!" He yelled grabbing her hands into his big warm ones. He looked into her eyes trying desperately to get her to understand him, to get her to see what she's doing to herself.

"How do you not hate someone who hurts you constantly?" He asked her.

"I don't know..." She whispered. Her eyes watered and a salty tear ran down her flushed cheek. He moved one of his hands and wiped the tear away. She held her eyes tightly shut. She didn't want to listen anymore; she didn't want to know the awful truth.

It was ironic how just a few hours ago she was having this conversation with Jacob, how she was desperately trying to make him see what he didn't. She wondered if Jacob was at a loss for words, when she was trying to reason with him, because that's how she felt right now.

She just couldn't walk away from Jacob though. He was her drug, she wanted to be there for him, she needed him to realize that maybe the life he has now isn't that great, that he could do better, better with _her_.

He let go of Leah's hand and turned around walking towards the woods.

"I'm not going to watch you get hurt anymore." He told her.

"Don't do it!" She yelled and ran after him.

He was already naked, feeling the fire burn down his spine and in a split second he was on all fours, running towards the asshole that had hurt his friend.

"PAUL DON'T!" Leah yelled after him, but he didn't listen.

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	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

_Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit. _

_- Peter Ustinov_

Paul urged himself to go faster; knowing how fast Leah was and that she would be hot on his tail. He could hear her close by, but the head start he got made it possible for him to get to the Cullen's place before Leah did.

He made it to the Cullen's in minutes and quickly phased before putting on his sweats as Leah ran out of the forest. He walked a few meters in front of the house when suddenly his body crashed to the ground. A little grass and mud went into his mouth. The rocks scratched his gold tinted chest.

"I told you not to do this." Leah snarled, pining Paul underneath her slim body, but Paul's superior strength and size gave him the advantage and with a swift movement Leah was under him, his legs were on either side of her body and his hands held hers above her head. He had a smirk on his muddy face, demonstrating to her that while she might be faster than him, she was not stronger. After all; he was one of the strongest wolves, if not maybe the strongest. Leah looked pissed, she detested when Paul showed off his strength.

"And I said I'm going to kick the bastard's ass." Paul said leaning down until his warm forehead was on top of Leah's.

"Just stay out of this-" Paul didn't get to finish as at that moment his body was slammed to the cool grass by the one and only Jacob Black.

"Get off of her!" Jacob yelled at Paul. Paul and Leah stared at him in shocked confusion; wasn't this the same person who had hurt Leah only a few hours ago? The same person who hand left a mark on her skin?

Paul got to his feet, walked towards Leah and helped her up. He held her behind him and looked at the bi-polar Jacob Black, who was crouched and growling, his breathing heavy.

"Look whose fucking talking." Paul spat with venom. The loathing in Jacob's eyes was instantly transformed into guilt and sadness.

"What I did was...I-I'm really sorry Leah, I shouldn't have let my anger get the best of me." Jacob said, lowering his head with shame.

Leah desired to tell him it was all right, that everyone lost their tempers once in awhile, but was it really okay? If the bloodsuckers hadn't stopped Jacob would he have stopped himself or would he have killed her?

"I wish I could say it was okay Jake, but it's not. If the bloodsuckers didn't stop you when they did I could have...died." Leah whispered. She saw both men flinched at the end. Paul's fingers started trembling and he made his way to Jacob, who was only a few feet away. Leah clutched Paul's muscled arms roughly and turned him around to face her. He unwillingly looked at her.

"What?!" He posed rudely.

"Don't do this. Let's just go to your place. I don't want to start anything stupid." She beseeched.

"Sticking up for my friend is not stupid. Just for once stay out of this." He requested.

Leah rolled her eyes and let him go, he was determined and she knew she would not be able to stop him. Paul turned around and glared at Jacob. Jacob had a frown on his face; he despised how close Leah and Paul were.

Paul walked up to Jacob and looked him in the eye.

"You fucking bastard." He said before allowing his right hand to make contact with Jacob's jaw. There was a nasty cracking sound and Jacob spat out some blood. He stumbled a bit but didn't react to Paul, he knew he deserved this; he had raised a hand to a woman, to his friend, his beta, someone he actually cared deeply for.

"Aren't you going to hit me?" Paul snarled, punching Jacob in the gut. Jacob hissed and fell to the ground, but didn't responded. Leah whimpered, she couldn't handle seeing Jacob hurt, she cared too much.

"Stop it Paul!" She yelled, trying to reach Jacob's side, but came to an utter stop when Jacob looked intently at her from the ground.

"Don't stop him." He commanded in a breathless low tone. This was the first time he had every used his alpha tone on anybody. She felt the command weigh in and her feet were planted in one spot; she couldn't move and she couldn't fight it. Paul didn't care what was going on with the two, all he saw was red.

"What's wrong Black? You can beat up a chick but you wouldn't lay a finger on me?" Paul demanded.

Jacob got to his feet swaying slightly as he waited for the next blow.

Paul swung his fist to Jacob's left eye, and his vision went blurry for a few moments.

"Jake!" Jacob looked in the direction of the voice and saw the whole Cullen clan on the porch expect for Esme and Nessie, Esme keeping Nessie occupied so Nessie didn't see the madness. It had been Isabella who had called out to him. There was panic on their perfect faces. He saw Carlisle making his way over, but Jacob stopped him in his tracks.

"Let him finish." Jacob told them, as everyone looked on in worry. Carlisle protested; he couldn't take violence, especially at his own home but he respected Jacob's wishes.

Everyone stood frozen watching as Paul landed blow after blow. Jacob was just lying down on the floor, face full of blood and dirt as Paul made sure he left a mark on Jacob, just like Jacob had done to Leah.

Paul was beside Jacob now, getting ready to do more damage when Leah couldn't see her Alpha like this anymore and her inner wolf, her beta knowing that it was wrong to just watch him hurt, pushed Paul out of the way.

"STOP IT!" She yelled as she knelt beside Jacob and positioned his head on her lap, stroking his short black hair.

"Jacob?" She whispered, and only received a moan in response. He looked a mess with blue and purple skin and dry blood and mud on his face.

"Dr. Cullen!" She shrieked, and in seconds Carlisle was kneeling by the two, getting his belongings out of his bag.

"Leah..." Jacob moaned. "I'm...I'm sorry."

"Shhh don't talk." She whispered, still stroking his sticky hair. The Cullen family surrounded them, but Leah didn't care.

"This is your fault mutt!" Isabella hissed. She didn't even seem concerned for Jacob, just like always she was trying to find something she could complain about.

"Listen to me you stuck up bitch, shut the hell up!" Leah boomed. She was not in the mood for this, not when Jacob was laying down hurt.

"You better leave before I rip your head off!" She replied as she crouched down into a fighting position.

Before Leah had the chance to reply Carlisle intervened:

"Isabella! How can you talk like this?"Carlisle look at what this animal has caused!" Isabella shouted back in a nasty tone, all the Cullen's, Leah and Paul included stared at her in surprise; no one every yelled or even dared raised their voice to the head of the family, the vampire saint, the one that everyone respected.

"This is my home, and Leah is always welcomed here. She stood by us at our time of need, in _your_ time of need." He said firmly.

"I suggest you take a walk with your wife." Carlisle hinted to Edward, and with that Edward took Isabella's hand and led her into the forest.

Dr. Cullen requested for Emmett to carry Jacob to his study and with that the rest of the clan went inside the massive white house.

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	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

_We choose those we like; with those we love, we have no say in the matter._

_- Mignon McLaughlin_

She was still and silent as she watched the Cullen's enter their large house with Jacob, who was bloody and knocked out in Emmet's muscular arms. Leah stood watching her Alpha who was soon concealed by the white walls of the Cullen's mansion. She didn't know what to think or do. Paul on the other hand moved to Leah's side quickly and held her warm hand in his and began tugging her body towards the forest.

After a few steps into the greenery Leah noticed what was going on and became aware of her surroundings once again. She looked up at Paul's face, and knew he was all right with everything that just happened with Jacob. This made Leah distressed, she felt awful and came to a sudden stop, making Paul stumble to a halt. He turned around to look at her. Leah's eyes looking at anything expect Paul's face. She didn't know how she was going to make him understand.

"Leah?" Paul asked the suddenly quite girl. Her strange behaviour making him uneasy. Seeing her avoid eye contact with him worried him more, he knew something was up.

"Leah?" He repeated himself when she didn't answer him. She finally looked up into his now light grey eyes, took a deep breath and whispered:

"I think I should go check on Jake." Paul froze; he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Why was she acting like this? Why couldn't she understand that Jacob was not her concern anymore, not after what he had done to her.

"Why?" he asked confused, desperately trying to understand.

"Because he's my friend, my Alpha." Leah said. Her strong warm arms circled around Paul's waist. She hugged him securely and leant her head on his warm bare chest, trying to keep him relaxed. After hardly a second he returned the gesture.

"I can't make you do anything, you don't want too," he chuckled "I learnt that the first day I met you." A warm smile appeared across her pink lips.

"But I can tell you that what you're doing is only going to cause you more pain." He continued, leaning his big head on top of hers. "At the end of the day, you're only hurting yourself and it pains me to think I'll have to see you go through that anguish again." He said honestly.

"I don't want to see you hurt Leah, I care way too much about you." He whispered as he kissed her temple. His warm lips made Leah feel cared for and _loved_.

"I know." She whispered, because what he said was true. She was only hurting herself, but she couldn't help it, Jacob was her drug, and right now she needed to have another fix.

They held each other closely, Paul not wanting to let go; he couldn't stand seeing her hurt, but Leah was a big girl and he needed to let go. There came a point where he had to just let her be, he had done all he could; he had advised and begged her but she never listened. He knew she was going to hurt even more, but what could he do? She was stubborn and strong headed, she never learned from her mistakes, she knew he had an imprint but still she felt like there was something more, and she would be damned if she didn't try to fight back against this powerful bond, because life was too short to live with regrets and what ifs.

So Paul had to let her go and when she finally realized that Jacob was taken he would be there; waiting on the sidelines for her. He would take her in and help her to heal her wounded heart in some way, but now all he could do was watch and wait, and maybe, just maybe, he was wrong, that Leah was right all along.

_*** Flashback***_

"_Leah, he has an imprint! You need to get over him." I had told her. This was the first time she had said something to me regarding how she felt about him. I had thought she was just being ridiculous and silly. _

_She had been sitting in my lap at the time and turned her light-weight body around to face me. _

"_No." She whispered. I wasn't shocked though; this was Leah god damn Clearwater and she always had to do things the hard way. Hadn't she learned from the first time that she couldn't fight against an imprint? _

"_Why the fuck not?" I asked bluntly. She was getting me upset, why couldn't she understand; she would just end up getting hurt._

"_Because I feel something... there's more, I just know it." She explained "Jacob and I are meant to be and I'm not going to give up." With that comment she had ended the conversation._

_***End of Flashback***_

Leah slowly tilted her head up to see his face. His expression was unhappy and apprehensive. She hated the turmoil she was causing him, but she had to do what her heart wanted her to do.

"I'll be back soon." She whispered.

*

Leah walked into the silent house. She didn't stop or even look around to see if anyone was near. She quickly marched up the stairs, following Jacob's scent. She came to a stop at what she guessed to be Carlisle's study. There was a soft voice issuing from the other side of the door. Slowly, and without knocking she opened the door to be greeted by the sight of Nessie sitting on Jacob's large white bed. Nessie, who was 4 years old but looked to be 13, was laughing lightly and running her pale fingers through Jacob's short black hair.

He was smiling back at her, and holding her unoccupied hand. They looked so comfortable together, lost in their own world. Leah was frozen. She wanted to run away, but her feet wouldn't move, so she just stared unwillingly at the pair. Her mind was screaming at her for ever even having thought that Jacob belonged to her, that he would ever leave _this _to be with her. The bond between them was obvious but still she was stubborn.

Her heart was beating painfully fast against her rib cage, every sound around her was mute and the only detail she heard was her pulse in her ears, throbbing rhythmically. Her trembling hands rattled the door a tad which gained Jacob's attention.

"Leah?" he whispered. She looked down at her feet with saddened eyes and took calming breaths. She needed to be strong. Finally her shaking came to a stop, and her heart rate returned to normal, or as normal as it could be when she was near him.

"Leah?" he whispered again, and she looked up with the fake mask she grudgingly wore, keeping her emotions in check so he wouldn't know what she was feeling, so he couldn't see how much it pained her to see him with _her_.

"I just came to see if you were okay." Leah told him, from the doorway. When she finished her sentence Nessie got up from his bed.

"I guess I'll see you later." She said sweetly, and leaned down to kiss him on the cheek. The motion was sweet and innocent, but Leah was sick to the stomach. Nessie walked towards the door where Leah was still standing and left without even looking in her direction or uttering a word.

Leah stood there quietly while Jacob just watched her. Eventually he broke the silence.

"You can come in if you'd like." Leah shut the door behind her lightly and made her way to his side.

The room was large and there was a second closed door which she guessed was where Carlisle did all his paper work. The floor length windows were clear, and for once it was sunny out.

"So...how are you feeling?" she asked; trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Tired and a bit sore but nothing a few hours can't fix." He said grimly.

Once again the room went cold and both just stared at one another.

"Leah, I was a complete jerk and I never should have laid a finger on you. I'm so sorry... please forgive me?" He pleaded. She could see in his eyes how awful and disgusted he felt with what he did. He was truly sorry, but Leah couldn't really form words at that moment.

"I...I don't want to talk about this." She whispered. She didn't know what to say to him. She couldn't just forgive him, even though she really wanted too. Paul may have given him a good beating but that still didn't take away the pain she had felt when he had raised a hand to her, it wasn't the fact that he had caused her physical pain that hurt her the most, it was the fact that he had considered it in the first place.

"Leah, you have to listen to me, I didn't -" He was cut short - Leah couldn't have this conversation right now.

"I better go, call me if you need anything." She said hastily and started to turn around but came to a stop when Jacob tugged on her hand.

His warm touch sent butterflies to her stomach, and her knees went weak.

"Please, please don't go." he whispered and right then nothing else mattered to Leah, because Jacob Black needed _her_.

But the feeling was cut short when Nessie walked back into the room. Jacob let go of Leah's hand and gave his full attention to his imprint. Leah walked out of the room without saying another word, she felt wounded and forgotten once again.

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	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

_I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone. _

_Javan_

Leah walked into the cottage, her emotions everywhere. She saw Paul in the kitchen making him a sandwich and plopped herself onto the big couch. Leah leaned her heavy head on the arm rest and closed her eyes. She was so tired; it had been a very long day.

She felt the other side of the couch weigh down and cracked open her eyes to be met with Paul looking down at her, concern evident in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" Paul asked. She looked into his eyes and knew there was no point in lying to him, this was Paul after all, he would always keep asking until you told him the truth. So Leah shook her head; no. A small frown formed on Paul's lips, he had known this would happen.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, well setting his plate of food down on the coffee table in front of him.

"No." Leah whispered. She didn't want to think about it anymore, it would only hurt her more. Paul sighed and grabbed his plate, he offered half of his very large sandwich to Leah and she took it gratefully.

"Thanks." Leah muttered as they both ate silently.

When they were done Paul pulled Leah onto his lap. She rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes; slowly both fell asleep in one another's arms.

*

Leah woke up and realized Paul had carried her to the guest room, which was practically her room since she spent all of her time there. She got up and cracked her bones before making her way into the bathroom where she brushed her teeth. She didn't even bother with her hair – she was going to have to shower later on today and right now she wanted some food.

Walking slowly down the thin hall she smelt pancakes and bacon, causing her mouth to water. She made her way to the kitchen where she found Paul cooking. It seemed hard to believe that Paul, the cocky meat head with the anger issues, could cook. He was even better than Leah at cooking and loved to rub it in. He didn't want anyone from the pack to know though, it was their little secret.

"Good morning my lady." Leah whispered, laughing at her not so funny joke.

"Good afternoon sleepy head." he replied with a smile; he was in a good mood today.

"Someone's so happy this morning." Leah stated. Paul really wasn't a morning person and neither was she.

"Yes I am, by the way its 2 pm." he said while placing a plate in front of her and a glass of OJ.

"Are you serious? Wow, but I feel so much better, full of energy! Why is my Pauline so happy?"

"There's a bonfire tonight, and you're coming with." Paul said firmly. Leah groaned, but she didn't get why he was so happy about a bonfire.

"Do I really have to go? Besides why are you so happy to go to a bonfire?" Leah asked.

"Yup, you have to go" Paul popped his 'p' " and I don't know why I'm so excited; I just feel like something good will happen today."

"Who's going to be there?" she asked, knowing that she was going to have to go. Paul loved torturing her.

"Everyone. There's a new pup, so basically they're welcoming him." he explained while eating off of Leah's plate, despite already having had his breakfast.

"Great!" Leah smiled, perking up at the news of the new addition "Can't wait!" She said and started eating before Paul finished everything.

"I knew you'd be happy about the pup." Paul laughed.

The thing with Leah was she rarely liked people, but the cubs were so sweet and so deeply in love with her it was too cute. There were about 3 of them – now 4 and every time they saw her they would drop everything they were doing and followed after her. They were so into her that they wouldn't listen to Sam's commands most of the times. To them Leah was their Alpha – Alpha Female. They begged Jacob to join his pack to be closer to her, but Jake didn't seem to like this idea very much - he usually preferred if Leah stayed close to him when the little puppies were near, which of course made all the cubs hate him.

But it wasn't just the fact that they loved her, to her it was her only chance she had to be a mother. She cared for them and had helped out when they had freaked out after they first phased. She loved each one of them as if they were hers. Everyone knew this, especially the cubs and they would sometimes use this information to get what they wanted from her, but this was Leah Clearwater, she didn't ever hesitate to put the cubs in place, didn't matter much though because they loved anything she did or said.

"Get ready were leaving soon." Paul said. Leah got up and headed into the shower.

*

Paul was giving a piggy back ride to Leah as they started heading towards the beach, they could hear all the laughter and the cubs growling when they saw Paul carrying Leah on his back. Everyone was already here.

"LEAH!" The cubs yelled and ran up to her. Leah looked down at them; she had missed them so much.

"Hey there pups." She laughed as they glared at Paul.

"You can let go of her Paul!" Adam the oldest, who was 13 snarled. Paul rolled his eyes, but didn't let go; he loved torturing them. They hated him; period, jealous that he was so close to Leah.

"Yeah!" Matt and Max, who were both 12, agreed. Leah laughed some more, they were just so cute. Her laughing made the cubs stop glaring at Paul and watch; amazed at the wonderful sound.

"Come on Paul, let me down - we don't want my babies upset now do we?" She smiled. The pups glowed with love when she said babies; Paul rolled his eyes once again and put her down gently.

"You should stop spoiling them." Paul said as he walked away to greet his friends.

"Leah do you wanna go swimming?" Adam asked.

"Do you wanna cliff dive?" Max asked.

"Or we can just hang out, you know." Matt said trying to act cool. Leah laughed again and once the noise was made the boys were in their own la-la land.

"Calm down boys, I heard we have a new friend?" Leah asked curiously.

"Yeah we do!" Matt yelled.

"Chris! Chris! Come here boy, Leah wants to see you!" Matt started yelling more so demanding, whatever Leah wanted they would give. Chris who was 12 years old came walking shyly, he reminded Leah of Embry. His head was down when he was near and Leah bent down and lifted his chin.

"Hey Chris, my names Leah Clearwater." She said warmly.

"Hi." He whispered, blushing a bit. Leah laughed at this and ruffled his dark brown hair.

"Don't be shy we're all family." Leah said sweetly, but she felt someone watching her and looked up to see Sam and Emily Uley staring at her, Emily had a smile on. "While some of us." Leah added bitterly, she still hated the couple for fucking her over. The pups looked at Sam and glared, they also hated him for causing her pain – they basically hated anyone that was close to Leah so, breaking it down, they hated all the males that were in her life.

Sam rolled his eyes at them; he knew this was getting out of hand with all the cubs thinking about Leah 24/7.

Leah got up and made her way towards her pack. Quil was holding a chocolate covered Claire. Leah leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. Claire smiling a toothy smile.

"Aunty Leah!" She sang, and Leah knew the little girl was going to have a sugar rush soon.

"You're so going to regret giving her chocolate." Leah told Quil, who just signed.

"She asked me." He explained as Leah chuckled. "I can't help it when she does the puppy dog eyes!" He boomed.

"You're so whipped." Leah told him and moved to go see Seth.

"Sethy-boo have you missed your big sis?" Leah asked. Pulling him into a hug. Seth and Embry had actually decided to move on with life and go to college, the collage wasn't far but she barely saw them - either they were studying, running patrols or partying like the collage kids they were.

She was actually having a decent conversation but it always had to come to an end, because Sam-fucking-Uley wanted to talk to her. They walked away from the group, the cubs looking angry at Sam for taking away their Leah.

"I know." Sam said anger rising. He started shaking lightly.

"What are you talking about?" Leah asked rudely, she didn't want to talk to the douche bag.

"I heard Paul's thoughts." He hissed, and right away Leah knew what he was talking about. She felt angered.

"I can't believe you didn't come to me Lee-lee!" He yelled.

"It's none of your business." She spat with venom.

"The hell it is!" He yelled.

"Listen to me Sam, when you left, you left_ everything_ behind. You have no right to stick your big nose into _my_ life. So get the fuck away from me and never bring this up again." Leah snarled. She didn't wait for a response and just walked away.

When she reached the group she saw the pups waiting for her. She chuckled lightly, they were just so cute. Yet another reason she loved them; they took away her negative moods.

"Look Lee I brought you a hotdog." Adam said proudly and handed it to her. Leah thanked him and gave him a kiss on the cheek, Adam started glowing and blushing; he was on cloud nine.

"Look Lee I brought you a soda!" Max yelled, waiting impatiently for his kiss. Leah laughed and gave him a peck.

Soon after Matt and Chris went and brought her food, Leah kissed them too. The boys started bring more and more food, all waiting for their kisses.

"Okay, that's enough pups." Leah said firmly, she actually thought she would throw up everything they shoved down her throat.

For the next couple hours she played with the cubs. The sky was getting dark and Leah searched around for Paul, she couldn't find him which was strange because he was always near her, so she asked around. Jared told her that he took a walk on the beach. After telling the cubs to stay where they were, Leah went to find him.

She was walking and walking until she saw Paul sitting in the sand, his whole body turned to one side, as if he was talking to someone. Leah walked closer and closer, Paul not noticing anything.

"Paul! Hey, where the hell-" Leah was cut short when she saw Paul making out with Rachel Black. Rachel turned red and Paul looked the same, avoiding looking Leah in the eye.

"Oh...my bad." Leah whispered and walked away. She didn't know what to think, she actually felt upset, she didn't know why, she knew right away that he had imprinted on Rachel, she saw how they fit, it only made sense Paul was not seen the whole day, usually he would stay close by Leah and make fun of the cubs.

"Leah!" Paul yelled, jogging after her. Leah stopped and turned around, she should be happy for him.

"Yeah?" She asked when he was only a few inches away from her.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Of course I am, like I am totally okay, everything's perfect." Leah answered in a way she would never dare answer; Paul looked at her with a frown.

"Bullshit." He said firmly. Leah looked up and into his eyes. She went straight to the point.

"You imprinted." She stated matter of factly.

* * *

**Loved KKJ's pups in Missing You so much, that I just needed some too! **

**Thanks for all your lovely reviews!**

**and as always,**

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. - __Robert Frost_

Paul looked at her and nodded slowly. Leah's head fell a little, Paul imprinting was really hurting her; she knew she was being selfish but it just _hurt_. Paul signed; knowing that imprinting was a tough topic for Leah. He lifted her chin and looked into her eyes. He saw pain, and this hurt him, but all he could think about right now was Rachel.

"Yes I did imprint and... she's amazing." Paul whispered, his eyes glazing over with the thought of Rachel. Leah's heart fell to her stomach, she should be happy for Paul but all she felt was pain.

"I'm happy for you." She whispered. It was true she really was happy for him, deep down. Paul leaned down and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you Leah." He whispered as he pulled her into a tight warm hug. Leah's pain eased off a bit; she knew that Paul would always be her best friend, that he wouldn't forget her. They'd been through a lot together and she knew he wouldn't leave her.

"Paul?" Rachel Black whispered. She was a few feet behind them. Instantly Paul let go of Leah to look lovingly at his imprint. The action hurt Leah; it was like Nessie and Jake all over again.

"Rachel." Paul whispered and Leah could hear he's heart beating rapidly and see how his eyes glazed over when he was looking at her, she saw how, in an instant, his whole face glowed. Seeing these things made Leah's pain increase. She felt awful for feeling so remorseful when Paul was so happy.

"I'm just heading back to the bonfire." Rachel told him and walked away. Paul's body ached to follow her but he needed to handle Leah right now. Painfully he tore his eyes away from Rachel's fading figure.

He looked down at Leah and saw the pain in her eyes, he felt awful. He didn't want to hurt her.

"Go Paul, I know you want to." Leah told him. Paul's body started moving towards the bonfire, completely forgetting Leah. He was a few feet away when he heard Leah's soft cry. He stopped dead in his tracks. He couldn't do this to her. They were best friends; she was like the sister he never had. He couldn't hurt her.

Paul turned around and ran to Leah who was sitting down in the cold sand, her knees pulled up to her chest and her head on her knees. She was taking deep breaths, forcing back the tears.

"Leah, I'm so sorry." Paul murmured as he pulled her into a warm embrace.

"No Paul, really go - go be with her." She whispered into his chest. It hurt Paul to be away from the imprint but he had to make sure Leah was okay.

"You need me, so I'll stay." He said sadly, he really wished he could please both his needs, but it was impossible.

"I'm fine Paul, seriously. I'm just tired." Leah tried reassuring him. Paul looked down at her and into her eyes. He felt his free will breaking down.

"Are you sure?" He asked and Leah nodded.

"I'm positive." She said firmly. She wasn't going to hurt him, Paul has been such a great friend to her, and it was time for Leah to return the favour. Paul got to his feet and brought Leah up with him. He hugged her tightly.

"Thank you Leah, thank you so much. I owe you big." He said sincerely. Leah held him tight.

"Your welcome, you big oaf. Now go!" She said trying desperately to sound happy and reassuring. Paul let go of her and kissed her on the forehead.

"I'll see you at home." Paul said, and turned to walk away.

"Not tonight." Leah muttered, making Paul turn around.

"What?" Paul asked in disbelief, Leah loved staying with him.

"I need some time to myself." She explained.

"But-" Paul tried to protest, but Leah cut him off.

"No buts Paul. I'll be fine, plus you need time alone with your imprint." Leah laughed but it came out humourless.

"You know you're always welcomed there – imprint or no imprint." Paul said firmly.

"Of course I know that, half of my wardrobe is there." Leah joked lightly. Paul smiled, feeling better knowing that Leah seemed fine, but then again he could be completely wrong. He put that thought to the back of his mind though, he needed to see Rachel.

"I'll see you around Leah!" Paul yelled as he started running back to the bonfire.

"Yeah..." Leah whispered.

*

Leah went home, and took a long hot shower, and got ready for bed. She took a deep breath and lay on her back looking up to the ceiling. She was exhausted but she couldn't sleep so she lay there for a while, just staring at the white ceiling. She finally had enough of doing nothing and got up and went downstairs, the house was empty and quiet.

Leah sat on the couch and turned on the TV though she wasn't really paying attention, she felt so... lonely. She hated it. It was in that moment she realized that she didn't want to be alone. Though she seemed strong and stubborn to those around her and told them that she didn't need anyone, deep down she longed for someone to hold her, to tell her they loved her and to just be happy. She didn't want to spend the rest of forever by herself. She wanted to wake up in the morning with someone by her side, someone she can trust and tell her deepest secrets to, she just wanted to feel something other than hate and pain, but it always seemed like happiness was just a few steps ahead of her. Leah sighed deeply and closed her eyes.

A few seconds later her doorbell rang. She got up unwillingly and went to answer the door. Slowly she opened it to be meet with eight glazed over eyes.

"What are you guys doing out at this godly hour?" Leah demanded.

"We saw your lights on – it's been awhile since you've been home." Max said happily, glad that she wasn't staying at Paul's for once.

"We were wondering if we could spend the night." Adam asked. All of the boys looked at her with wide eyes, pouting.

"Fine, but straight to bed, you guys have school tomorrow." Leah allowed.

"Can we please stay up for awhile? Please Lee." The boys begged.

"Fine, you have half an hour." She caved. The boys booed.

"An hour." Adam demanded.

"20 minutes." Leah replied smirking. All the boys growled at Adam, he always fell for the trap.

The cubs made their way to the kitchen all taking their seats casually. With Sue moved in with Charlie and Seth gone to college, Leah was always home alone, but most of the time she had the cubs.

They ate and chatted for the next 20 minutes, and finally it was time for bed. Leah put them to bed and made her way to her room, she was beyond tired.

*

The next morning Leah woke up and headed toward the rooms the boys decided to crash in. She walked in to see that the boys where spread out anywhere they had space. Adam was on Seth's old bed, the sheets tangled around his body, Max was on the floor, legs spread wide – one perk of being a wolf; you could fall asleep anywhere. She smiled at them. Leah woke them up before going into Sue's old room to wake the other two, after a few moans and whining all the boys where down in the kitchen, eating everything they could lay their hands on.

"You guys better get going." Leah told the boys and unwillingly they got up and headed to the front door which Leah held open for them. She smiled down at them and kissed their cheeks. She watched, laughing as they started racing and fooling around with each other.

"Better be good!" She called after them and heard their fading away voices saying: "Yeah, yeah."

Leah closed the door and went back into the kitchen the pups had destroyed, she needed to have a long talk with them when they got back. Leah started washing the dishes when she heard the doorbell. She wiped her hands dry and answered the door.

There standing in front of her, half naked, was Jacob Black.

"Leah..." He whispered, pleased to see her. Leah didn't say anything, she just stared.

"We need to talk." Jacob stated firmly. Leah nodded her head and Jacob passed through the doorway and went straight to the living room. Leah closed the front door, and slowly went back to the living room, wondering what Jacob was here for.

* * *

**Huge thanks to my beta for beta'ing this real fast!**

**As always,**

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_Open your heart and take us in, love - love and me. - W.E. Henley_

Leah sat on the love seat, staying as far away as she could from Jacob. She didn't want this – the distance, but how could she be close to someone who had hurt her? Someone that was her Alpha, someone she trusted, someone she loved. She wanted desperately to be Jacob's girl, but how much was she willing to give up? She'd thrown herself out there and all it did was hurt her, she wasn't willing to give up her remaining pride and self respect by crawling back to him.

Deep down, she wanted – no, she _needed _Jacob, she needed to see him; he was her drug, her high, with him around nothing else mattered. Every chuckle and every smile he shed made her heartbeat pick up speed and sent it into over drive. Her mind would haze and all thoughts and senses would leave, her vision would only see one thing – her _obsession_. His warmness melted her insides, and she would have this goofy smile on her face – this was what Jacob did to her. He swept her off her feet and drugged her into this la-la land, which she loved so deeply and she would just pray that one day it will all be permanent.

Jacob took a deep breath and got up. He felt horrible about what he'd done to Leah. He would do anything to take back what he did to her – _anything_. She meant a lot to him, she was his beta, his best friend, the only person who could keep him grounded. But now he couldn't even look into her eyes. He felt so ashamed; he never ever thought he could do such a thing. It was like it wasn't even him when he attacked her. He had no thoughts, all he knew was that Leah was bringing back memories he did not want to revisit. She'd made him so _furious_, so out of control, that she'd brought out the animal in him.

He knew there were no excuses that could ever make what he did okay, because there wasn't anything that could make this situation okay. But he needed her forgiveness. He couldn't live without her. Leah meant so much to him, she was the only one who knew how to relate to him, and they had so much in common and were alike in so many ways.

Leah was the complete opposite of Nessie or Bella; Leah spoke her mind, she was passionate and she was real. Everything about her was natural; she was the one and only Leah Clearwater, the goddess of nature, the beauty of the sea and woods, she was so damn _real_. Bella was always shy and quiet and made the stupidest choices, she was clumsy and she was always broken. That was why he was always there for Bella, he loved to fix her, and made sure she was okay, knowing full well that Bella could take care of herself now – Jacob couldn't stop, he needed to fix something and that's where the imprint came in, he was close to her and he needed to fix something, it was what he felt he had to do.

That was the biggest difference between the two, Leah hated when people who tried to help her but Bella loved the help – she needed the support. Jacob was a fixer, so when it came to Bella and Nessie he was always there trying to fix them, trying to make sure they were okay, he felt responsible for them but with Leah; she didn't need fixing and it made him feel like his old self again. When he was near Leah he could think about himself and what he wanted to do, he didn't need to follow Nessie around and he didn't need to know how Bella was doing, because Leah made him feel equal, she made him feel like a regular guy, he felt cared for when she was near and light in her company – there were no burdens thrust upon him when he was with her; bottom line was he had a choice when he was with Leah.

He didn't want to lose that feeling, he just couldn't. He would do anything for her. He needed her in his life, because without her he was lost.

"Leah, I was worried about you." Jacob said, making his way to her, he quickly took a seat beside her.

"No need to worry." Leah started. "I'm completely fine." She lied.

"Leah I'm just so sorry, I know it's not enough but I need you to know that I never ever intended on hurting you... I just lost it; I got so angry I wasn't thinking." Jacob pleaded, taking her warm hands into his. He stared deeply into her eyes, trying desperately to show her that he never wanted this to happen.

Leah stared into the pool of chocolate and she melted, she knew he hadn't meant it; he did take a good beating for it and he also apologized an awful lot, so why torture him? Her walls were breaking down quickly – she needed Jacob, no matter what he said or did to her – she was addicted.

Her need for him was so strong it was hard to explain, she just _needed_ him, she _craved_ him, he had her heart and she needed him close so she can survive. There was nothing – _nothing_ that could keep her away and she didn't care, because Jacob Black needed her too, it was evident in their eyes that the two couldn't live without one another.

"Please Leah, I... I need you." His voice below a whisper, she barely caught it.

"I need you too." Leah whispered and that was all he needed to know before he crushed her body to him. They felt so good together, so perfect. Leah wrapped her arms around his neck tightly, inhaled his addictive scent and flew to her la-la land.

Jacob held her around the waist closely, bringing his head lower to the curve of her neck, and he inhaled, letting her intoxicating scent take over his body. They stood like this for minutes holding onto each other, taking in all they could, realizing how much there touches and smells burned each other's skin and senses. He needed to feel more; this wanting inside of him was yearning for more, as if his body was aching for something to feed the hunger, to satisfy the animal within him, Jacob pressed his lips lightly to Leah's neck, his lips burning for more. Leah moaned at the intense pleasure of his lips, this felt so right. The moan making Jacob's needs intensify and he sucked lightly. Leah arched her back, rubbing her round perky breasts into his chest making him growl, his inner wolf was wanting and needing more, he sucked harder.

Leah moaned again and moved down backwards on the couch taking Jacob down with her. He was steadying himself on top of her, still sucking away hungrily. He made his way up her neck and started planting kisses anywhere he could. Leah leaned her head up and moved her lips to his ear and she nibbled, sucking it softly. This made Jacob moan. The gesture driving him crazy, he needed _more_.

Leah released his ear and she moaned his name softly.

"Jacob..."

That was all it took for him, in that intense second his lips crashed with Leah's and the world stopped. The kiss was rough and full of longing. It was desperate and animalistic. Leah's hands ran to his hair and she tugged him closer, trying to deepen the kiss. The two were lost in their own world, kissing roughly, trying to fulfil all their needs and desires.

After a few seconds the phone started ringing. Neither cared. The phone went straight to the voice machine and a voice broadcast to the room:

"_This is Mr. Mitchell, the principle from La Push Middle School. Ms. Clearwater I need to speak to you as soon as possible, the boys are in trouble – again." _

Mr. Mitchell's voice held annoyance and anger. This was the sixth or seventh time he has called her in the last three months!

Leah growled and broke the kiss unwillingly.

"Why can't they ever stay out of trouble?" Leah murmured to herself. Jacob was kissing and sucking her neck, not even bothered from the message.

"Jacob... come on I gotta go." Leah complained. Just when she was actually happy there was something out there to stop her. _Damn you fate._ Leah thought. The boys better have a good explanation or someone was going to have hell to pay.

"Forget them Leah." Jacob growled, he hated the pups - they were always there taking away his time with his beta.

"Can't. I love them too much." Leah smiled. Jacob frowned and stood up, helping Leah to her feet.

"Why don't they call Sam? I mean it's his pack members!" Jacob complained.

"Because they don't like him. Besides I'm their Alpha female." Leah laughed and headed towards the door.

* * *

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**As always, **

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn. - David Russell_

"He's waiting for you inside." The elderly secretary smiled sweetly at Leah, she was getting use to seeing her around. Leah smiled a shy smile and made her way to the now familiar door. She knocked twice and heard a grumpy reply for her to enter. Leah strolled in, and was met with 10 pairs of eyes on her, 8 bright with ecstatic and two upset and heated.

"Bob." Leah nodded.

"Call me Mr. Mitchell please." He said automatically.

"Hi Leah!" The boys chipped in with excitement, waving at her happily. Leah twisted her gaze to them, giving them the most pissed off glare she could ever muster. She was displeased they were in trouble again but she was also annoyed that her and Jacob's moment was over. She had been anticipating that first kiss for a long time and now instead of being with him, she was here dealing with the mess the cubs caused. The boys weren't affected by the glare; their goofy grins still firmly in place all in high spirits at this opportunity to see Leah.

"Please Ms. Clearwater take your usual seat." Mr. Mitchell stated. Leah took her seat a little frustrated that Mr. Mitchell was speaking to her in that tone.

"So what did the boys do this time Bob?" Leah asked annoyance evident in her voice.

"Call me Mr. Mitchell." He demanded. _No_ _wonder why the boys hate him so much._ Leah thought. He was so uptight and demanding.

"Can we please get to the point?" Leah asked she didn't want to be here either.

"The boys had a fight-" Leah cut him off.

"Come on Bob they're boys, they fight and fool around, it's natural." Leah said irritated.

"Ms. Clearwater this wasn't just some little school fight, this was 4 young boys sending 2 class mates, broken and bloody, to the hospital." Mr. Mitchell stated furiously. "They were out of line and started this fight out of nowhere." He stated.

"But Mr. Mitchell-" The boys complained but were cut short hastily when Mr. Mitchell raised his hand.

"Not another word." He said firmly.

Leah signed. "I want to hear what they have to say." Leah said looking towards the boys; she knew these boys and they wouldn't just start a fight for no reason.

"Adam speak." Leah demanded, still angry with them for bringing her to the school and making her speak with the most annoying and hated person in La Push – Bob Mitchell, or make it that second most annoying person in La Push, to Leah, Sam would always be number one.

Adam stood up from the bench and gazed into Leah's eyes.

"We were going to math and you know how Max and I hate math and how as usual Matt wanted to skip class, but Chris was trying to convince him not to skip because he said you would be mad and-"

"Adam get to the point." Leah advised him irritably, Adam nodded and went back to talking.

"So after Chris gave Max and I a lecture about how it's important to go to math class, because apparently we need it in the real world, which I personally disagree, I mean maths a waste of time, seriously why do we need to learn slope? It's not like I'm going to wake up every morning wondering what the slope of the equation y=4x+9 is-"

"Adam!" Leah hollered.

"Sorry." Adam murmured.

"Well we went to class and Derek and Rob came up to us and wondered how much we were paying you to hang out with us!" Adam explained anger coursing through he's entire body.

"And that's not the worst part!" Max added fuming.

"Yeah, they started talking about you Leah!" Chris inserted.

"They said how your ass was just the right size and how they wanted to grab-"

"Okay that's enough." Leah stopped Matt from continuing hurriedly.

"As you can see Bob, the other two boys were talking smack about me and the boys were trying to stop them from talking disrespectfully. The boys got what they deserved. Cased closed." She defended them although internally she was fuming that they had dared beat up the very people it was their duty to protect.

"Its not as simple as you assume Ms. Clearwater, these two boys were critically hurt. It is school policy that students do not touch one another, regardless of the reason, therefore Adam, Max, Matt, and Chris are suspended for one week." Bob said.

Leah rubbed her face with her hands.

"Fine." She mumbled and got to her feet.

"Come on boys, we have a lot to talk about once we get home." Leah said, and went to hold the door for them, one by one, the boys walked out; ecstatic that they had just gotten a week of school off.

*

"For the week you guys have off you will be home before 8 pm. There will also be no parties or cliff diving during that time. You will be doing all the chores _and_ you're only allowed to leave if you have patrols." Leah said firmly as she laid down the law. The boys sat at the dinner table with their heads down, they knew they couldn't get out of this one.

"But Leah!" Adam complained.

"No buts, you guys have gotten in so much crap these last few months – I don't care if they were talking about me, you do not lay your hands on people. For crying out loud, we're trying to protect these humans from vampires but instead you guys, the "protectors," are hurting the humans more than the bloodsuckers are. You guys are lucky I didn't tell Sam." She scowled.

"Thank you Lee." The boys said in unions.

"So who has patrol?" Leah asked.

"Chris and I are first." Adam said and the two boys got up and left.

*

It was after one in the morning, the boys were fast asleep. She was on top of her roof; she often came here when she needed to be alone, to think things through. When her father had died Leah was always up here reminiscing about the time she had with him, Harry was the most important man to Leah. He was her best friend, her role model, her protector, he was everything she needed, but then he had left her and the only blame she could ever muster was herself – she had killed him, no matter what people said she knew deep down that if she hadn't turned into a fur ball he would be alive right now, holding her and telling her that everything was going to be okay, that he cared for her and loved her, that she would never be alone because he would always be there for her.

She lay down on her back and looked up into the clear, dark night sky, the stars staring down at her and the wind blew lightly, blowing her short black hair around. There was so much she regretted in life, so much she had let go. Thus, when it came to Jacob she knew she would have to fight to keep him; she wasn't going to sit around and mop. She wanted him and she was going to try as hard as she could, because this time Leah Clearwater wasn't going to let fate take away someone else that she loved. This time she wasn't going down without a fight.

It was hard though when the person she loved was taken and he had hurt her in so many ways. How was she going to make him notice that she was the one for him? So many thoughts were spinning through her head she felt as though her head would explode.

Leah closed her eyes, and she could feel him near.

"How long have you been here?" She whispered. It was hard for Leah to explain how she knew he was there; it was like she had this connection with him no one could ever explain.

"A while." Jacob replied.

He needed to talk to Leah; he just didn't know how to start. What happened that afternoon was completely out of hand; he had never planned for everything to get so out of control. Leah meant the world to him but there was Nessie, his imprint, he was supposed to love her, she was his world – right?

Jacob's thoughts weren't any better than Leah's, they were both confused, but Jacob needed to know what Leah was thinking, what she was feeling. They had been seeing less and less of each other since Jacob imprinted, but he'd always had these feelings for Leah. All he knew was she was integral to his happiness.

"Leah?"

"Yeah Jake?" she opened her eyes to see him lying next to her, so close but yet so far away.

"What happened?" he asked, wanting to actually hear her say it.

"We kissed." she whispered.

He turns his head to face Leah. She was looking into the sky, breathing calmly. He looked at her and saw the most beautiful creature he's ever laid eyes on; she did strange things to him. He felt things he shouldn't, he couldn't love Leah, he had an imprint, he's destiny was already decided for him. But what about the kiss? Did he regret kissing her? No. He didn't regret it but he couldn't love Leah, he had an imprint. It was a fundamental fact that Nessie's pull was so strong he _had_ to be there for her – but he _needed _Leah.

"What happened was a mistake." he told her. He didn't want Leah to think that there could be something between them, it was impossible, he was destined for someone else, but the way he said it sounded unsure, like he didn't believe it to be a mistake.

Leah took in a deep breath and tried to calm down. It hurt so much, but what he'd said couldn't be true, he couldn't feel that way – could he?

"Did it feel wrong?" She whispered - she needed to know this, if Jacob said yes she would take it like a woman and walk away, leaving him alone with his demon spawn, but if he said no she would fight.

The answer was easy but his body and mind couldn't deal with the truth.

"No." He whispered. Leah's heart picked up. She knew there was something there between the two.

"But I have an imprint Leah, I can't do this." he said.

"But it felt right." Leah stated.

"I can't hurt Nessie."

"But you can hurt me." Leah whispered.

"I never said that." Jacob reported.

"But that's what you implied."

"Leah you know I could never hurt you." he argued.

"But you already did." Jacob flinched, she knew it was a low blow, but it was the truth.

"I never meant it, I've apologized and I hate myself for what I did." Jacob whispered.

"I know."

"I'm sorry Leah, for not being enough." Jacob said sadly. He wasn't ever going to be good enough for her, he could never be hers.

"I'm sorry I'm not enough Jake, I'm sorry I'm no bloodsucking monster." Leah said, her anger rising.

"It's not that you're not enough Leah, you're more than enough." He needed her to know that it wasn't her, it was him.

"Then what is it?!" Leah yelled.

"I need you Leah, okay? I need you!" Jacob explained.

Leah turned her body to him, and wrapped her arms around his neck. As she held him tight, Jacob wrapped his arms around her waist and automatically relaxed.

"Than what is it Jake? Why can't you just be with me?" Leah whispered her heart on the line.

The two fell into silence.

"It's the pull Leah. It's so strong. I have to see her and be around her, it's painful to be away from her, but I need you Leah. You're so different and you make me feel different, when I'm near you it's not about the imprint or the Cullen's, it's just you and me, and I need that in my life." He whispered into her ear.

Leah pulled away from him, sadness washed over her face.

"You can't have both of us Jake." She turned her face to him and looked him deep in the eyes.

"It's either _me or her_."

* * *

**Thanks for all the reviews, thanks to my beta for dealing with my errors.**

**As always,**

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

_What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time_**, **_my ego_**, **_my attention_**. **_Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction_**. **

– _Chuck Palahniuk_

"It's either _me or her_." Leah said firmly as she looked into his eyes.

"Leah..." he whispered, shutting his eyes tight.

He couldn't believe she was asking him to choose, this was not fair to him. He couldn't choose –he just couldn't. Nessie was his soul mate, he had to see her, but Leah made him feel things he never felt before, he needed the normalcy she provided in his life – he wasn't going to give her up either.

"Don't do this." he said through clenched teeth, his eyes still shut tight.

"I'm tired Jacob, I'm tired of being second best!" Leah yelled, as anger burned through her veins.

"I can't believe you're asking me to choose!" Jacob boomed as he got up to his feet and jumped down from the roof. He walked towards the wet woods, his body shaking.

"Don't you walk away from me!" Leah yelled after him as she followed, quickly catching up.

Jacob stopped in his tracks and took a deep breath as he turned around slowly.

"You know it's not fair Leah, you can't fucking put me in this situation!" Jacob yelled with anger - the thought of her even having the nerve to ask him such a thing was only fuelling the fire within him.

"Fair? You wanna talk about fair?" Leah laughed humourlessly.

"Well Jacob, is it fair to me that fate took everyone I cared for and loved away from me?" She yelled as her hand slammed on her chest, empathising each word.

"I lost my father, because fate decided 'Hey let's make Leah Clearwater a wolf, the only one of her kind, a freak'. I phased in front of him and he died. Tell me Jacob, was that fair?"

"I lost Sam to imprinting, he meant everything to me, I spent four years with that bastard and then fate decides to take him away!" Leah puffed out her chest, her breathing becoming heavy, she had never really talked about how she really felt when her world came crashing down.

"Emily is his world." She stated matter of factly. "He claims he loves me, but his love for Emily will always be stronger. Fate took him away from me Jacob, that's not fair." she said as her frame shook.

"Then fucking fate decided that Leah Clearwater hasn't had enough and took Paul away, when I finally felt like things would be okay, that maybe just maybe I could move on, that I actually had a friend who cares about me, fate decided to make him imprint – fate took him away from me!" Leah repeated. Jacob looked at her with wide eyes, not knowing what to say.

"Imprinting has taken everything away from me. I'll always be Sam's second best; I'll always be Paul's second best. It's not fair Jacob."

"I'm tired of being second best!" She yelled before moving close to him and cupping his cheeks in her hands.

"I thought I loved Sam." She whispered, looking him in the eyes. "I swear to god, I thought I loved him." She laughed lightly.

"But the love I had for him can't even come close to what I feel for you. I love you more than anything. It's not only my heart that yearns for you, my whole body does. It aches for your touch. Every fibre of my being needs you. You're my sun, my air - I _need_ you Jacob." Leah said with so much love that her whole body burned from the intensity of the truth of her words.

"When fate decided to take you away from me...my world stopped." Her voice broke. "I'm not going to lose you Jacob. Fate is not going to take you away from me too." she whispered as Jacob slowly brought his hands to her cheeks, wiping away the warm salty tears. He looked her in the eyes, and could see how much she loved him, how much she cared and then slowly - painfully slowly he lent in for a kiss.

Jacob pressed his warm lips to her soft ones and the world melted away - everything stopped, there was only the love they had for one another in the air, as both of them desperately tried to hold on to the moment; to the feeling of being able to love whomever they wanted to.

"I'm not going down without a fight." she said firmly as she broke away, unwillingly, from the kiss.

Jacob pulled her into a hug, holding tightly as if this gesture alone could make the imprints pull go away, but it doesn't. He felt a compulsion to run, as fast as he could, to that white house, but there's a part of him, that melted into her touch, making his heart pound against his rib cage, the feeling was so new, so right, that it made it easier to fight the pull, however Jacob didn't know how long he could last before he gave in and left, satisfy the imprint.

They held each other closely, but as time passed Jacob could feel the imprint pull strengthen. He begged it to go away, he couldn't stand to hurt Leah - not after what she said and how much she cared, but it was no use because he could feel the cold blood pushing through his veins and reaching his heart, freezing over the warmth Leah created.

"I don't want to hurt you Leah..." He explained as his body went limp and his arms fell from her waist. His body beseeching him to leave Leah and sprint to rejoin the woman he was fated to be with but his heart was fighting; desperately to keep the warmness.

"I can't leave her." he whispered. "The pull is too strong." His body starts to freeze over and he slowly backs away.

"I'm sorry Leah..." He apologized, sadness filling his voice. "I...I have to... leave." He choked out.

Leah stared at his back as he walked away from her, her heart beating so furiously it hurt. She shook her head – _no_.

"Fight it." she whispered after him.

"Leah, please forgive me." Was all he could say as he involuntarily ran towards the forest. His back disappeared into the trees and Leah fell to her knees, letting the sobs consume her.

This was _not fair_.

* * *

**Sad, right? Poor Leah.**

**You blackwater lovers should also check out my new blackwater fic, bad timing, I know, but it just came to me. It's called Clearing The Storm.**

**As always,**

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

_If you have love in your life it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else there is... it's not enough. - Ann Landers_

The cold, heavy rain pounded on her over heated skin as her vision blurred with the salty tears. She let them slip from her eyes, mixing in with the rain. The sobs shook her petite body. Her slim hands were fisted and she felt her nails dig into her palms. She kept slamming her fist against the wet ground, causing mud to shatter all over her body.

"Leah!?" His voice called after her, but she did not say a word because she was already consumed in her pain, pain which no one could get her out of, expect _him_. To her he had always been the only reason to live, to wake up every morning and go about her day, everything she did, she did it for _him_ and now he was gone, so what's the point in living?

She had given up on life a long time ago, but she kept fighting for _him_. What was she going to fight for now?

*

He held her body close to his well built chest as she kept crying silently. He finally made it inside and took her to her room. Setting her on the wooden chair, he went to find her some dry clothes. Upon procuring the desired items he returned to the room quickly. He put them down on her bed and went to kneel in front of her.

"Leah, honey, you need to shower, you have mud all over you." Paul whispered, as he took one of her dirty hands into his. Leah sat there lifeless. She couldn't even wrap her mind around what had just happened. Jacob had chosen Renesmee over _her_.

_He chose her. _

_He chose her. _

_He chose her. _

_**He. Chose. Her.**_

She repeated to herself, and every time she thought about it, she felt her heart break a little more.

"Leah, honey, please, I need you to help me, so I can help you, okay?" Paul asked as he squeezed her knee.

"Paul?" She whispered into the air, he barely caught it.

"Yes Leah?" He looked into her eyes, and flinched at the intensity of her pain. Leah looked down at him as a few tears slide down her flushed cheeks, she was about to say something when four young boys came walking into the room, completely unaware of her state.

"Hey Lee-lee! What is he doing..." Adam stopped in his track when he looked at her, she looked like a mess, wet and muddy all over, but what froze the young boys hearts was her eyes, they weren't the eyes that they knew and loved, these eyes were pained, these eyes were red and puffy, these eyes were full of agony. They weren't the eyes he and his brothers had fell in love with, there was no twinkle that always took their breath away, these eyes didn't match the Leah they loved, and they never wanted to see these eyes ever again – it did not suit her at all.

"What's wrong?" Chris asked, finally breaking the awkward silence, all the boys stood frozen, they hated this Leah, they didn't want this Leah, and such a beautiful girl like her shouldn't be in this pain.

"Nothing." Leah said as she tried to collect herself, she didn't want the pups to see her like this, she didn't want anyone to see her like this, she was suppose to be strong, fearless, a leader, a _mother_ to the boys and no kid wanted to see their mother looking so weak and fragile.

"Bullshit." All of the boys said, as the anger suffocated the room.

"Boys please; I'm fine I just need time to be alone." She tried reassuring them, but failed miserable.

"Who did this Leah? Tell us!" Adam demanded as his frame shook slightly. They wanted to find the person responsible for her pain, and rip them apart; putting them in the same pain they were causing their Leah.

"No one! Just leave me alone!" She yelled. Leah yelled at the boys all the time, but this time it seemed harsher, she felt awful for yelling at them for something they didn't do, but she didn't have the energy to apologize.

The boys looked hurt, but that emotion was quickly over powered by anger.

"Not until you tell us who did this?!" The boys pressed.

"I think you pups need to go for a walk, Leah needs time alone right now." Paul told the boys firmly as he got to his feet.

"But –" Adam protested. He was cut short.

"Please." Leah begged, as she desperately tried to hold herself together and not show weakness in front of the pups.

The boys looked at her pained visage, and slowly exited her room.

*

"Shhh! I can't hear!" Matt shushed the other three boys as they eavesdropped on Paul and Leah's conversation. They had been waiting for about an hour; Leah had finally come out of the shower, she wouldn't talk at first but now they thought she was finally going to spill.

"Leah is going to kill us!" Chris whispered.

"I said shut it! She's actually talking!" Matt shushed.

The four boys quit talking and perked their sensitive ears, from the bush which was closest to Leah's open window.

"Start talking Clearwater." they heard Paul demand.

"There's nothing to talk about." She replied lifelessly.

"I'm not a pup, you can't bullshit me." He said agitated. "I can read you like a book, remember?"

Adam growled at this comment.

"Paul..." They heard Leah sigh.

"Come on Leah, you know you can tell me."

She breathed in and out deeply. "Jacob... he...he chose her, Paul. He picked the leech over me." Leah admitted, her voice cracking.

"That mother –" Paul was cut short.

"I don't want to hear it Paul, please not today." Leah spoke softly.

"Of course Black had something to do with this!" Adam whispered angrily tuning out the rest of their conversation, they got what they needed.

"I think we know what we have to do." Max stated, as the boys started stripping down, all of them phasing at the same time as they ran – Jacob Black couldn't just hurt their Leah and get away with it.

* * *

**IMPORTANT A/N: Sorry for the delay. I have to say that the reviews have been lovely and I want to take the time to say thank you. Theres been a lot of things going on in my life right now, mostly with my health, I've been to the doctors a few times, and they've finally found out why I have nasty cramps - apparently I have a cyst in my right ovary - this is not dangerous but it does cause a lot of pain - it also shocked my doctor to know how big it is - 9cm. My body is suppose to take care of it by itself, but I will be going back to the doctors in Jan. to see if its gone, if not I guess they have to get rid of it themselves. I wanna say thank you to Luci for keeping me calm, your amazing babe! So if there isn't another update soon, its because of this issue - but I promise that I'll try to update soon.**

**Most of you were mad, that I made Jake leave... we'll I'm not going to say sorry, because I think thats the way it should be, Jake just can't break the imprinting bond like that...**

**So make my painful afternoon wonderful, by pressing the green button! **

**REVIEWS = LOVE.**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

_Forgive me my nonsense, as I also forgive the nonsense of those that think they talk sense. - __Robert Frost_

"For the last time, you're not joining the pack." Jacob yelled automatically, while walking down the porch as he saw the pups standing in a straight line outside the white house, their smouldering glares burning holes into his chest , Jacob tried not to laugh at the little boys as they tried to act tough and macho.

"We're not here for that Black." Adam snarled, his anger burning his skin, making the heat waves run freely down his spine.

"Although I would like to join –" Chris began, but was cut off by a heavy smack to his head from Matt.

"Hey!" He whined rubbing his now sore head, turning it slightly to his left to be met with a fixed stare.

"Did you forget why we're here?" Max asked mockingly.

"Oh yeah...my bad." Chris muttered, as a picture of Leah's pained eyes formed in his head. He cringed at the image.

"Listen boys, I suggest you all run home – you're breaking the treaty just by being here." Jacob stated irritably, crossing his arms firmly as he stood watching them.

"We don't give a shit Black." Adam started. "We know what you did to _our_ Lee-lee!" Max boomed.

"She's not your Leah." Jacob said, holding the urge to stick out his tongue. He didn't know why but he always felt this way when it came to the pups – they just made him so... jealous? He shook his head a little; he couldn't believe he was jealous of the pups. Once again Leah made him feel things he never thought he would.

"You hurt her Black and I think it's time for you to have a taste of your own medicine." Adam spat as the four young boys held their heads higher and puffed their chests out, showing Jacob Black that they weren't scared.

*

Leah lay on her bed, her back facing Paul. She was beyond upset, not only at herself, but at life in general. She was so tired of fate handing her the second best card – it just wasn't fair. She didn't fall asleep; she couldn't - her mind in over drive, leaving her wide awake.

Paul sighed; his body still stiff and tense from the phone call a few minutes ago.

"Go Paul." Leah muttered, not even bothering to turn around and face him.

"She's fine. You need me so I'll stay." Paul said wretchedly. She hated _this_ relationship she has with Paul, everything was different now. She wasn't Paul's number one anymore – Rachael Black was.

"Just fucking leave." Leah said; she wasn't going to be forcing anyone to stay by her side unwillingly.

"Its nothing, she just wanted to go to have lunch – no big deal." Paul tried reasoning –more so to himself than her.

"I mean it Paul, go. There's nothing here for you to do here anyway. Go be with your imprint." She talked into her pillow. Paul was quite for a few seconds. It was like she could feel his will power crumbling down.

_3, 2, 1..._

"I promise I'll be back in a few hours." He said as he hurriedly rose from the bed. Leah stuffed her face deeper into her pillow, she had known he would leave, but it still hurt nonetheless.

Paul made his way to her bedroom door, and he turned around as he reached it to look at her petite body which was almost lost in the white messy sheets. He felt awful. He knew he hadn't been a good friend, but it was so hard to fight the pull.

He took a deep breath and made his way to Leah's side, knelt down and brought his warm hand into her hair, letting his fingers flow through the silky blackness.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. A few minutes passed, as he kept running his fingers in her hair, his fingers disappearing into her thick hair, knowing that she loved this gesture. But, as always, the pull came back stabbing him in the chest, stronger than before. He slowly got up and kissed the top of her head before leaving the silent small house.

*

She was still wide awake. It might have been five minutes since Paul's been gone or maybe an hour - she didn't know and she didn't care. She felt so...alone. It was a sad feeling. Depressing. She hadn't ever felt this alone; not even when Sam left. This was a new level of loneliness. This was a feeling of...nothing. She didn't even really think about it – she just felt it. She felt how her insides were empty and her mind blank. It was as if she was frozen and the world kept spinning around her. Everyone was gone and she was trapped in a room, with nothing and no one. She was in a state of shock, loneliness and numbness. She was invisible. Her pain was invisible. Her life was invisible. That was the best way she could describe it.

She still lay there covered in the warm white sheets but still she felt cold, so very cold. The moments were slow and her breathing was steady, the only thing you could hear in the small house. She lay on her back, staring at her white ceiling, lost in the world of nothingness, as the phone began to ring. She ignored it, but it kept ringing. The sound piercing through the silent hall. Finally she got up and at a snail's pace and picked up the phone, pressing the talk button lightly.

She brought it to her ears and said weakly:

"Hello?"

"Leah Clearwater?" The cold voice says.

"Rosalie?" Leah asked in disbelief, why would a leech call her?

"Yes it's me. I was calling to inform you that four of your boys are here – outside with Jacob. I don't think it's going to end pretty." She finished.

"Shit." Leah muttered and hung up the phone without saying goodbye. She headed straight to the door, and ran towards the green forest, stripping and phasing before she was even under the safe cover of the trees.

*

"What the fuck is going on?!" She yelled as she tugged down her white dress, walking quickly in between them.

The cubs crouched into a fighting stance. Jacob still stood in his spot, eyes dark with fury.

"I said, what the fuck is going on?!" Leah demanded, frustrated that she had to repeat herself.

Adam was the first to get out of his position.

"We know that Black was the one who made you look like that this morning. We know it all Leah and we're here to put his ass through the hell he's been putting you through." Adam said, passion and fury lacing his words.

"Leah?" Jacob whispered confusion evident in his voice. _What did she look like? Hell? What kind of hell did I put her through? _He thought.

"Boys." Leah said firmly, ignoring Jacob. She walked over to the boy's side and she knelt down in front of Adam as the rest of the boys huddled around Leah, making a protective circle.

"Listen, I know you guys mean well, but you can't be running around picking fights with everyone I have issues or arguments with. Its sweet, but I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." Leah explained, as she took each of the boys' hands and planted a kiss on each of their warm palms.

"Besides when you guys go running around like this it scares me - I don't want anything happening to you guys. You mean everything to me. So promise me you won't do anything stupid." Leah said firmly as she got up. All the boys looked up to her and muttered their promises.

"Now go home. I'll be back soon." She told them and with one last glare to Jacob Black, they phased and ran into the woods.

Leah turned around and noticed that all the Cullen's were outside, even Reneemse.

"The boys were too riled up to remember about the treaty. They didn't mean to break it." she said hastily.

"Its alright, everyone's safe." Carlisle reassured her quickly.

"Well yeah...anyways I better get going." Leah said as she turned around walking into the forest.

"Leah!" Jacob yelled as he ran after her. Leah turned around looking at him without emotion.

"What?" She asked rudely.

"Are you okay?" He enquired, needing to know that he wasn't hurting her – that when he left she was fine, that nothing he could do would make her hate him and that she was not going to walk out of his life – because the bottom line was Jacob Black needed Leah Clearwater.

"Just peachy." She replied bitterly and turned to leave.

"Leah wait!" Jacob yelled as he ran after her again. She didn't stop this time, so he grabbed her arm, jerking her body to a halt. She turned around unwillingly. They both stared at one another.

"We're fine right?" Jacob asked hopefully. Leah started laughing humourlessly.

"Just perfect Black!" She answered, sarcasm dripping out of her mouth heavily.

"Leah." Jacob said sadly.

"What do you want me to say Jake?" Leah began, anger once again burning her skin. "That I'm okay with you raising my hopes only to dash them again?" Her eyes were piercing.

"I don't want you to feel that way... I care for you...but" He was at a loss for words, he couldn't let her go – it was that simple, he wished the situation was that simple.

"But what?" Leah demanded. She waited for him to answer but he wouldn't say a word.

"You can't have us both Jake, and I guess you made it clear who you chose." She said prying his hand off her arm.

"I never chose anyone." He said firmly.

"When you left, you left me and you ran to her. You chose her." Leah snarled.

"I never chose anyone." He repeated.

"Whatever makes you sleep at night Black." She said as she walked away.

"Don't leave." He called after her. She froze and without turning said:

"Well at least now you know how it feels when the one you care for walks away."

*

She walked around in the forest, letting her legs wander - not thinking just walking. She knew she should go home and talk to the pups but she just didn't want to deal with anything at the moment. So she walked.

She walked and walked and walked. Loosing track of time the sun soon began to fall as the woods got dark. Nothing mattered to her as she walked; not thinking, not caring.

_Snap_.

She froze and looked around the darkness. Though she saw nothing she could feel someone watching her.

"I know you're out there." Leah called.

"It's nice to see you." A voice called as someone walked out from behind a tree, her scent burning Leah's nose.

"What do you want leech?" Leah snapped.

"I just wanted to talk..." She whispered, as she came closer to Leah.

* * *

**Its 3:30am. I need sleep, but wanted to post this up, didn't want to delay it any longer. ****Follow me on twitter, if you wanna know whats going on with the stories, and updates! **

**/ozlem3221**

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	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

_Anger is one letter short of danger._

She gracefully made her way to Leah, coming way too close for Leah's liking.

"Get out of my face before I rip you to pieces." Leah spat at the very pale, model like girl.

"No need to get your panties in a bunch Leah." She smirked.

"Listen Isabella, I have no time to deal with your shit." She said angrily and continued walking.

"It's Bella," She automatically corrected "and it's not like I enjoy this any more than you." She muttered under her breath, and in the blink of an eye she was in front of Leah.

"I came here to warn you." She said seriously.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, coming up in my face and 'warning' me?!" Leah yelled harshly.

"Stay away from Jacob." She continues, ignoring Leah and cutting straight to the point.

Leah's frame started shaking, her vision turned red.

"What the fuck are you talking about?!" Leah yelled.

"You think I'm stupid?" She demanded. "I've seen the way he looks at you, how he doesn't really pay any attention to me anymore, and the way his bond with my daughter is loosening." She said; her frame still.

"I'm not going to sit back and watch you ruin my daughter's future. You're not going to take him away from me, from us." She announced firmly, as her glare burned holes into Leah's forehead.

Leah took a deep breath, controlling her anger - if Isabella wouldn't listen to her when she was angry, than she thought it would work if she took a calmer approach to making her understand, even if internally she felt like ripping her into pieces.

"You know what Isabella, the world does not revolve around you, and Jacob is NOT in love with you anymore. He's NOT yours, he never was." She said calmly.

Leah started walking away - it was true, Isabella never wanted Jacob, he gave and gave and she never took, now that he didn't want her in the same way anymore Leah knew it would drive her crazy. She was so used to everything being about her that she never cared about Jacob, or even about her daughter.

"BECAUSE OF YOU!" Isabella yelled as she once again appeared in front of Leah.

"I never did anything," Leah argued "You had your chance, and you blew it when you picked Edward."

"I need Jacob in my life." She whispered.

"_Why_!?" Leah boomed. "You have everything; you have your husband, you have a child, you have the money, the cars, the clothes, but most importantly you have a family. You don't need Jacob, you never did, but you're too selfish to realize this." Leah snapped; it was time for someone to make Isabella see that she couldn't have her cake and eat it too.

"My daughter needs him... so back off." She snarled. She was willing to use anything to keep Jacob away from Leah.

"Have you ever taken the time to even think about your daughter?" Leah laughed "Because to me all I ever hear from you is '_I need Edward...' 'I need Jacob...' 'I want to be a vampire...'_ you're so self centred that you don't even realize about Nessie's future." Leah said, watching Isabella's face dwell in confusion.

"Don't you care that your daughter won't be able to go out on dates? To meet new guys? To break up, and fall in love the right way? To be able to make her own choices?" Leah asked.

"Jacob's always going to be the right choice." Isabella said firmly.

"For who?" Leah asked "You or Nessie?"

Leah looked into her cold gold-ish red eyes; she saw the anger burning in them, the way her fist clenched to her sides. They were both still and quiet, then Leah, having nothing more to say, started walking away.

She didn't see it coming and in an instant she was banged against a tree, the impact not only breaking the tree in half, but breaking her spine also.

Leah's head was throbbing with pain, her back aching, werewolves were strong, but when it came to new born vampires they didn't really stand a chance alone.

She lay on the cool wet mud as Isabella came walking towards her.

Slowly, when she was nearer, she kneeled down, leaning her head near Leah's ear.

"No one can take him away." She said coldly, tilting her head up a little to look into Leah's clouded hazel eyes.

Leah so desperately wanted to tell her off, that Jacob didn't want her, that she was a fool if she thought he would let Isabella hurt her like this. At least she hoped that Jacob wouldn't want her to get hurt.

Isabella leaned her head down near her ear again.

"Not even you." She whispered, as she leaned into the crop of her neck, she took a deep breath; the smell of wet dog disgusted her but the adrenaline made everything else seem grey as she brought her lips to her burning skin. She let her lips linger and finally whispered:

"I'm going to make sure of that." And slowly she opened her mouth, her pearly white teeth sunk into Leah's warm flesh, as Isabella relished her poison.

* * *

**The amazing Reijilie has made a banner for Me or Her! Also one of my lovely readers had asked someone they knew to make a banner for this fic! They are both beautiful and on my profile check it out and tell me what you think!**

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**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

_You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it._

The pair were sitting on the huge white couch; the young half-vampire's eyes were glued to the TV. Jake sat beside Nessie, thinking, thinking of _her_, of Leah once again. Wondering what she's doing, wondering if she really did hate him.

His thoughts were everywhere, making him drained; he was slowly drifting off to sleep, when his heart suddenly started beating frantically.

"Jake?" Nessie asked concern evident in her bell-like voice.

His body started shaking as he roared in agony, his big, rough hands grabbed at his chest, as if this gesture would stop the tightening pain.

His heart kept pulling and pulling as if it was trying to free itself. Then, just as fast as it came, it disappeared.

"Jake?" She whispered as the room went extremely still, the only thing she could hear was his harsh breathing.

"_Something's wrong_." He finally whispered as he quickly carried his large frame towards the wooden door.

"Jake! Jake, where are you going?!" Nessie shouted in confusion, as she ran after him into the dark gloomy woods.

*

The deer she was sucking the life out of was warm and soft, the way the steamy blood burned down her throat was a hard sensation to describe.

Not even half way she started choking, her vision blurring as the images danced around her head. She quickly dropped the dead deer and started running, yelling in an attempt to rile up the rest of the Cullens.

"Please Bella; please tell me you didn't do this." She muttered under her breath as she was quickly joined by her puzzled family. She watched as her brother's face went pained, but he quickly pulled himself together and began running faster.

*

_(The whole pack is here: Sam, Paul, Embry, Quil, Seth, Collin, Brady, Matt, Max, Adam, and Chris.)_

The hungry boys all sat around the small crowded kitchen table, it was always crazy in Emily and Sam's kitchen. The whole pack was there, waiting impatiently for food.

"We want food!" They all chanted.

"It's coming!" Emily called, smiling as she made her way to the kitchen table with over a dozen muffins. She quickly set the huge plate down, expecting the boys to attack the plate only to be utterly shocked when no one moved.

"Boys?" She questioned. "Sam?" She asked worriedly, but all she got in return was growls and screams, each wolf grabbing at their chest, she started panicking but as quickly as it had happened it stopped.

The room went quiet. Emily, not being able to take the quiet, spoke first.

"What's going on?" She whispered, eyeing each wolf.

"_There's something wrong..."_ was all Sam managed to reply before the whole pack rushed out of the small wooden house.

*

The thunder was booming, rain pounding, but all that could be heard was the heavy sounds of their cruel breathing as the pack ran, they were not in wolf form, they were too busy running to this pull to even phase. It was as if the world stopped moving, that all their senses were paled in comparison to the pull. The feeling was sharp, jabbing into the young men's souls, as it guided them to the location it desperately wanted them to be.

"Is that Jake?" One of them asked as they saw him running in the same direction as them, not far behind they saw his imprint sprinting after him, but what really frightened the pack was the fact that the vampire coven was right behind the pair.

No one spoke; no one voiced their concern as they all ran together. The pale white and copper red mixed together, like the green and blue of the ocean, as they followed the pull.

*

Jacob was the first to reach the pull. His body moved before his mind could process the scene before him. In a swift motion he threw Isabella 100 feet away from Leah, her body tangled up in some tree.

"Leah!" Jacob yelled as he hovered over her shaking body. He pulled her head on to his lap, as he stroked her short black hair back.

"Leah! Leah! Please wake up!" He yelled as her body kept shaking.

In a matter of seconds Jacob and Leah were surrounded by the rest of the pack.

"Leah?!" The whole pack yelled as they saw her shaking form. Soon after, the rest of the pack were on their knees, surrounding the young women, consuming her in their heat.

"She's...she's been bitten." Seth whispered, his eyes watering.

The whole pack growled in dismay as they tried to hold back their tears.

"We have to do something!" Sam yelled, looking at the now pale Leah.

"I can help."

The voice was clear and concerned. He stood a good ten feet away from the livid, huddled wolves.

* * *

**A/N: I want to say THANK YOU to all the reviews, bad, good, or even just a word really does make me happy! :)**

**I got a lot of mixed reviews last chapter, I just want to clear some things. **

**Leah was attacked; SUPRISED ATTACKED. She didn't see it coming, so she couldn't do anything! She than was hit into a tree, broke her spine - causing her to not be able to get up. New borns are strong, stronger than older vampires!**

**YES. My chapters are short, I find really longer chapters boring and just too much!**

**UPDATES - I'm not going to be sorry, that I haven't been able to update, people! I have a life, I have responsibilities, school and health issues to deal with.**

**And a heads up, this fic will be ending soon.**

**As always, **

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

_Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways - Stephen Vincent Benet_

The furious wind cries agonizingly loud as it powerfully lashes out over the warm bodies, it is as if it knows something is terribly wrong. Though the wind screams its dismay, everything else seems gray and silent to the young wolves as their searing salty tears escape from their red, swollen, and worn out eyes. They are huddled in a circle around their sister and to them she wasn't just another girl, she was strong and powerful.

She was the bright star when it seemed too dark out, the warm ray of the heated sun, but now as their heavy hearts beat as one, hers beat weakly as it was slowly being left behind.

She wasn't strong, she was weak _now_.

She wasn't powerful; she was small _now_, lost in her own skin.

She wasn't the bright star anymore, her fire had run out and _now_ she was lost in the dark.

She wasn't the warm ray of the heated sun; she was cold _now_ as her life was slowly fading away.

"You have to do something soon! You're losing her." Carlisle's voice held the heavy concern, not just because he was a doctor, but because he actually cared for the young female wolf. He had grown fond of her and her fascinating behaviour was hard to ignore, she seemed out of control at times which interested him, but what really sparked the fondness was her loyalty.

She was someone who everyone looked up to in some way. They might not admit it but they all knew that they wished that some of Leah's unique personality and the way she held herself together as a strong front would rub off on them. She portrayed someone who seemed invincible, but reality was finally kicking in because Leah Clearwater _wasn't_ invincible. She was stronger than humans, yes, but she still had human emotions, human organs, human needs, and human limits.

_Everyone_ has limits.

Now her cold, small dying body lay in Jacob Black's warm arms.

"He's right. We're losing her." Seth whispered as his golden body shook with the ugly sobs he failed to hold in, but he didn't care if anyone saw that he was crying like a little girl, he was losing his sister and he'd cry for hours if it would make everything better.

All the wolves closed their eyes tightly as they took deep breathes, all repeating one thing. _Don't die Leah, please don't die._

"The elders." Chris, the newest to the pack mumbled as his head was low, tears covering his golden cheeks.

"What?" One of them asked as they all looked at Chris, the confusion hanging heavily in the air.

Slowly realization hit Sam, the oldest of the bunch. "The legends." He whispered softly.

"I thought the Quileute wolves were just legends but I was wrong, that legend was true, maybe there are legends of the chants they used to bring back a spirit or something." Chris spoke up, and as soon as he was done Jacob pulled Leah's pale body into his warm arms and ran, the pack quickly following behind him.

*

Sue Clearwater was hovering over her daughter's small pale body; she seemed lost in the pool of white sheets as she lay still on the bed. The entire wolf packs surround her as Sue sat on the bed with Leah. Sue's cheeks were damp with salty tears, as she whispered into Leah's right ear. Her thin dry lips moved but there was barely any sound, mumbling the same word as she ran her thin fingers through Leah's black waves of hair.

Sue would sometimes bring her lips to Leah's forehead and let them linger for a few seconds, and then she'd blow air all over Leah's frozen body as if blowing away the pain.

Billy and the rest of the tribe elders were near the bedroom door as they too were whispering the same thing.

The room was filled with soft words and heavy heartbeats. All the wolves' eyes shut tightly, their heads bowed. They did not think, nor speak, letting their inner animals take over. So, still and quiet, they waited as Sue continued to do the same thing over and over again. It seemed like hours, but maybe it were only seconds, when Sue finally turned to Jacob.

"I did the best I can; now it's up to you." She said, as a tear slide down her cheek.

Jacob looked confused; how was he to know what to do? "Sue? I can't do this." He barely whispered as he looked at Leah's body, she had started to shake, her body soaked in sweat and she was mumbling as her eyes were tightly shut.

"You are the true Alpha you need to do this. Save my daughter Jake, please." She cried as she walked behind him.

"What do I do?" Jacob asked. He was scared. What if he did something wrong? What if it didn't work? He would be blamed for her death, but he was the cause of her death in the first place, maybe if he hadn't left after her declaration of love to him, everything would have been fine now, and he couldn't have protested because he knew it was because of him. He would never be able to live with himself if anything happened.

"I can't tell you what you have to do, but remember, you are the true Alpha and she is your beta, only you can bring her back now." Sue stated as she tried to hold herself together.

Taking a deep breath he went to sit beside Leah, grabbing her cold shaky hand in his warm ones.

"Leah?" He asked as she kept shaking. "Leah wake up." He said, as he stared at her, but there was no response.

Slowly he lowered his head, close to her ear. "Leah," he started as he slowly placed his free hand on her chest, feeling her slow heartbeat, "You're not leaving me. You're not leaving your family and friends, so wake up now. You're my beta. I need you." His words were so firm.

He waited, and her heartbeat start to pick up, but it didn't feel right. Her heartbeat was beating too fast. "Leah?" He whispered as fear and sadness filled within him.

His hand was still on her chest and her heart beat at a furious pace, but then it _stopped_.

* * *

**I'm evil, I know.**

**Next chapter is the LAST CHAPTER. **

**WARNING: I think a lot of you will hate me next chapter...**

**HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO REIJILIE, LOVE YOU BB! ****& MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 3 DAYS! *smiles***

**As always,**

**REVIEWS = LOVE**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

_  
Stop and stare  
You start to wonder why you're here and not there...  
_

Darkness.

Dark water and dark skies surround her as she slowly breathes deeply in and out. Her tiny broken body lost in the dark bottomless sea. The water is warm and gentle as she floats on top the pitch black surface. This is calm. This is peace. She floats soundlessly. She is happy here. She's somewhere where the pain of sadness and loss does not exist. This is a place where feelings and emotions are not welcomed or acknowledged. You do not feel anything here. You just float soundlessly on top of the black clam water.

So she floats, maybe for days, hours or just mere seconds. Her eyes are wide open, but she sees nothing because this place is dark, so dark. This place is empty, this place is _nothing_.

She welcomes the numbness though, but for how long? How long till she wants to feel again? How long can she stand the darkness? How long can she stand the emptiness, the loneliness?

_Stop and stare  
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere..._

Not forever. Maybe not even for a day. She was an impatient young woman, she always wanted fast, she always wanted more. She enjoyed the cool numbing, but she felt naked, uncomfortable and bare. She felt nothing. Her body felt... _dead_. Was she dead? Was this why she couldn't feel? She tried to move her fingers but...nothing. She couldn't move.

Her brain goes into over drive and her thoughts consume her.

If this was death, then this was easy, she didn't feel and she couldn't move... and she was okay with it. She was okay with the thought of being dead, fine even. Being dead meant that she wouldn't feel pain, she wouldn't feel anything. Slowly a small smile appeared and for once in what seems like a long time she had a smile on her blank face, but this smile doesn't reach her eyes, it doesn't warm her insides. This smile was nothing, meaningless, just like the rest of her body, and as quickly as the smile had formed it disappeared.

She floated a little longer in silence, her lips turning down, she started thinking about _him_.

What was he doing?

Did he miss her?

She shut her eyes tightly and starts thinking about the cubs, her pack, her family, everything and everyone she thought she didn't really care for. She felt like crying, she felt like screaming, but she couldn't. She couldn't feel anything, couldn't even move a finger.

She tried, really tried to do something but ended with nothing. She was giving up... and this time she wasn't upset. She had never given up on Jacob, she tried, she told him how much he meant to her, she gave him everything and he... he gave her nothing in return.

So why should she try now? Why should she give up this peace and clam for pain and sorrow?

_What about the cubs?_ The annoying voice in her mind asked.

_They have Sam._ Leah said sharply.

_What about Paul?_

_He has his imprint._ She answered in the same tone.

_What about your pack brothers?_

_They're probably happy that I'm gone._

_What about your family?_

_They don't need me._

_What about your tribe?_

_They have the others._

_What about love?_

_No one loves me._

_You're wrong Leah. Just listen. Listen to them calling you. They need you, no matter what you think._

Slowly she closes her eyes, she takes deep breaths. She strains her ears, trying to see if she could hear anything and slowly but surely she does.

The whispers were light, like soft raindrops leaving little kisses on her warm body. She smiles and this time she felt the warmth spread through her heart, and melt away the numbness. She felt her emotions running deeply, and as her heart starts beating frantically the water around her begins slamming and pulling at her tiny body, as if the winds were clashing into one another causing her to rock back and front strongly.

Nothing was clam here anymore.

The waves hugged every part of her and took her down to the bottomless sea. Leah held her breath as panic started pumping through her veins. She needed to breathe, but the water was sucking her deeply downwards. She was slowly letting go, giving up... till she heard _him_.

"_You're not leaving me. You're not leaving your family and friends, so wake up now. You're my beta. I need you."_

His words were so firm, so warm to her, and she knows she needs to fight back. For him, for the cubs, for everyone, so she pushes and pushes, trying so desperately to resurface.

_They're trying to come back, all my senses push  
Untie the weight bags, I never thought I could.  
Steady feet, don't fail me now  
Gonna run till you can't walk..._

*

His hand was still on her chest and her heart beat was at a furious pace, but then it _stopped_.

Everyone in the room was frozen, their breath caught in their dry throats. The room was filled with a painful silence.

Leah was... _gone_.

"Leah..." Jacob whispered as tears ran freely down his strong flushed cheeks.

"Leah!" Sue cried as she tried to get near her daughter's bed, but Seth and Quil are holding her in place, supporting her weight as she sobbed piercingly, the saddest sounds coming out of her thin dry lips, she was barely able to stand on her own two feet.

"Leah! My baby girl!" She crumbled to the ground, the two wolves by her side, tears cascading down their flushed cheeks as they lose themselves in the pain.

Every pair of eyes were soaked in salt. Everybody shook with sorrow. Everything felt so unreal. This just couldn't be happening... this was Leah! The strongest person they'd ever known. She had seemed invincible to them...but she _wasn't_. She never was - she had human organs, human needs, she had a heart, blood flowed through her veins; she wasn't a dead frozen body like those bloodsuckers. She was capable of getting hurt or even dying.

Then, in the snap of a finger, they heard a gasp.

"Leah?" Jacob asked through his big fat tears.

Leah opened her eyes and sat up straight, her hands clawing at her chest, sucking in deep breathes.

"Leah!" They all yelled as they heard her heart start beating normally again. They all huddled around her, eyes drying as they just watched her, disbelief and awe written all on their faces.

Leah was alive.

*

_If you can tell me why he left I'll give you a shining ribbon to tie or throw away._

_Just tell me._

_A shining ribbon would look so pretty in your hair._

_I don't cry so don't worry tell me, it would make me so happy to have the truth and to see a ribbon in your hair._

The night was warm. The full moon's light was showering the cool water with a breathtaking glow. The stars pale in comparison to the full glowing ball. The wind was blowing lightly, playing with Leah's black silky hair.

Leah was sitting in the cool sand, digging her fingers and feet deeper into the damp sand.

It had been weeks, three weeks to be exact, since the accident.

"Tell me." Leah whispers, she knows Paul is near, he hasn't left her side since the accident.

"Does it matter Leah? Jacob's gone. Forever." He says bluntly, the words sting, they add fuel to the fire within her chest.

"It matters Paul, it matters a lot." She tells him, her tone is unfeeling; she's been using this tone ever since he left. Paul sits near her, very close in fact, since the accident her temperature has dropped, still a bit higher than the humans, but nothing compared to the wolves.

"Your not suppose to stress yourself, you've been bitten Leah, you can't take that lightly." Paul tries to reason with her, but this is Leah Clearwater after all.

"It's been three weeks Paul, I'm fine, in fact what would make me even better is if you would stop fucking bullshitting me and tell me what happened!" Leah's losing her cool, it's the first time in weeks she's shown how angry she really is, in fact it's the first time in weeks that she's showing any kind of emotion.

Paul is silent, he does not speak, nor does he move. The silence pisses her off, she wants answers, she needs to know... and then it all makes sense.

"He didn't. I can't believe it! He... he put a command on you?!" Leah boils, getting up quickly she starts pacing, muttering about what kind of a jerk Jacob Black is.

"He wanted to tell you himself, believe me when I say I tired Leah, but I can't break orders, he's the true Alpha." Paul says defeated and anger laces his words as he utters them bitterly.

"When?" She demands.

"I don't know, just... don't," Paul starts to say, but he quickly stops and grabs Leah's right hand and pulls her down, into his warm side.

"You know I'm here for you, no matter what, you're my best friend and I'll do anything for you, right?" He whispers to her, and Leah turns her head, looking into his eyes and whispers back:

"I know, but how do you think I feel? I wake up literally from the dead and you all leave shortly, you guys don't come back for days and when you do none of you speak a word, not to me or the elders." She takes a breath. "Why did he leave me? Why isn't he back? Why is everyone acting like nothing ever happened?! So many questions, but no answers. I'm sick of waiting, I just want to know."

*

_I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone..._

Five months, of waiting, of no answers, of nothing. She's tired; he just won't leave her alone. He's not even there, but yet he's _there_. In her mind, in her dreams. Haunting her day and night.

And just like every night, around midnight, Leah sits on the cold damp sand, digging her fingers and feet into the dampness.

_These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase..._

But tonight, when she's lost in her pain and cold thoughts she doesn't realize that her company tonight isn't Paul, it's _him_, it's Jacob Black.

"A penny for your thoughts." He whispers into the cool night, and Leah's whole body and train of thought freezes at the sound of his deep rough voice. Slowly she turns her head to see Jacob sitting in the sand, a few feet away. Her chest heaves heavily as she tries to calm down.

_He's here. He's finally here._ She thinks.

The silence is heavy, neither of them are willing to break it, but it comes to a point where the tension is over whelming, making their hearts beat painfully against their rib cages.

"I've waited so long for this," Leah starts, staring into his sad brown eyes, which makes her insides melt, like they always do. "Why Jake? Where were you? What happened?" She needs to know.

"Leah..." is all he says, and Leah stands, looking down at him.

"Answer me! Fucking answer me Jacob Black! I've waited months! I deserve to know!" She yells at him, her eyes starting to water.

"When you woke up, I thanked whatever god that was answering my prayers," Jacob says, shutting Leah up. "Words can't describe how I felt. You were alive Leah, and that's all that mattered...but I needed, I needed to get revenge. They broke the treaty, they hurt you. My beta, my friend, you mean so much to me..." He trailed off.

"So we all took off running for a few days," Jacob continues, Leah sits back down, her body facing Jacob, who was looking straight ahead. "We found them in the woods, we circled them, and I was ready to attack, I didn't care that I was going to kill Bella, she wasn't important to me, you were. She hurt you, meaning she hurt me. We were all ready to attack when... _she_, came in between." Jacob stops. The memory of that night hits him hard; he has no choice but to remember.

_She was standing there, fear evident by her body language, holding tightly to her husband, Edward. She was begging, begging Jacob to not do this, telling him that she did this for him, for them. Her pleas only made him angrier. _

"_Leah had to die! She was ruining your life, our life!" She boomed, and that was all it took to get him ready to let the animal within take over. _

'_She's mine' was his last thought before he planned to attack, but he stopped right in his spot when he saw _her_ running in between. _

_His body froze. His heart was pounding so heavily it hurt. His breaths were sharp and deep. _

"_Jake please." was all she needed to say. _

"You couldn't do it." Leah finally whispers.

"I ... I, she... it's just so –"

"Save it." She cuts him off. She quickly gets up and starts walking away and Jacob doesn't protest, why would he? They both know that there's no future for them, all their doing is hurting one another.

Walking away is hard but realizing that this is the end of the road is even more troubling. No more pining after him, no more waiting, no more hope. It was time for her to let him go, because it was clear that Jacob Black could never be hers. She was always going to be the second choice, her needs would come second to Nessie's, Nessie is more important and right now she's angry at him, but deep down she knows he doesn't have a choice, just like Sam didn't either. But it's so _hard_. Being rejected the first time was like a bullet to her heart, and this time its worse, it's like someone just ripped out her entire heart, stomping on it till there was nothing but mush. This was her fault, who was she to think she could pull Jacob back down to earth? She was no one. She was fucked and broken, and that's all she'd ever be.

The whisper of "I'm sorry." and the painful sobs are the only sounds filling the dark sky that cold La Push night.

_THE END_

* * *

**STOP AND STARE - ONEREPUBLIC **

**IMMORTAL - EVANESCENCE **

**IF YOU TELL ME (POEM) - SANDRA ABMA**

**--**

**I wanted to say that when I started this fic, I already knew that Leah and Jacob would NOT be together, so say what you want, this is my fic, and this is my ending! Most of you hate me right now... but nothing can get me mad today, wanna know why? CANADA BEAT USA! WE GOT 14 GOLD MEDALS! THAT IS A NEW WORLD RECORD! *breathes and gets back to writing this very important A/N***

**It's finally done, and its bitter sweet. I would like to take this time to say THANK YOU for everything. For all the reviews, alerts, favourites, author favourites, author alerts, kind words, love, and support! **

**A BIG thank you to my lovely beta, you amaze me with your patience, without you my writing would be a hot mess, so thank you so much! **

**I also want to say thank you to my lovely wolf girls Rei, Tc, Lu, Pink, Britt, and all the new friends I've made for not getting bored and tired of me! Love you girls!**

**A little heads up for people who want more work from me, I have another blackwater fic that's begging to be published! So look out! **

**There is about 90 favs, 118 alerts, so I am expecting a ton of reviews! This is your last time to be honest with me, did you enjoy it? What was your favourite chapter, or favourite part? What did you hate? Do you want to bitch at me?... well, go a head. **

**As always, REVIEWS = LOVE!**


	16. Note

**I wake up to a bunch of hate/disappointed reviews. I'm not going to lie, I was expecting them. But what I wasn't expecting is that some of you are telling me that this isn't a _'true'_ blackwater fic... that I shouldn't have put this story under Leah and Jacob... that you loved this story, but because of the ending you just hate it now.**

**Everyone has a right to state their thoughts. I'm not mad that you guys don't like the ending; I'm not going to send you an angry reply back. I honestly don't have the time to worry about what everyone thinks.**

**It's sad because I think that some of you guys are forgetting the difference between constructive criticism and just being rude. And the fact that this is FAN FICTION! The author of the story will end their story the way they want too.**

**No one has even given me an example or explained why they feel that way. No one even talked about my writing or how I can improve or anything related to my writing!**

**If you hate the story, you hate it. If you love the story, you love it.**

**Some of you are asking for a sequel, I want to clear the air now – there will be NO sequel, I just don't write sequels.**

**Anyways, enough with the negative shit, I want to also take the time to say thank you to the people who enjoyed it. You guys make writing so much more fun!**


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